Someone to Know Me
by CCS AnGeL00
Summary: Videl Satan has the means to get her almost anywhere... except for Wilton Academy, a top rated boys' boarding school. What's a girl to do? Cross dress, of course, and throw her new roommate into a whirlwind of sexual confusion and insanity...
1. Default Chapter

**Official** **Summary**:  Videl Satan has the looks, smarts, talent and money to get her almost anywhere... except for Wilton Academy, a top rated boy's boarding school.  What's a girl to do?  Cross dress, of course!  And, as an added bonus, she gets to throw her new roommate into a whirlwind of sexual confusion and insanity.

  
**Someone to Know Me**  
By CCS Angel00   
  
  


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**Chapter 1**: … And So It Begins  
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_***_  
Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.   
                                                                      --Mark Twain  
_***   _

It was a rarity that Videl Satan was ever denied anything.

She was astonishingly rich, had one of the biggest houses in the world, and was the daughter of the man who saved the world from Cell.  She had her pick of the newest cars, and was pretty much allowed to do whatever the hell she wanted (except if it had to do with boys) and got away with it. 

It didn't help much that she was like fireworks; beautiful and exciting to look at from a distance.  However, be warned; if you get too close, you get burned. Severely. Therefore, she almost always got what she wanted, when she wanted it, how she wanted it.

_Almost always. _

"Can you believe they denied my application _again?  That's the _second_ time this semester!" Videl raged, throwing the envelope on her kitchen table.  Her actions startled Miya, who was serving breakfast. "Those bastards won't even let me take the entrance exam! What snobs," she sneered, taking an angry swig of orange juice. She was, of course, referring to the Wilton Academy, one of the most prestigious schools in the whole world. It was a boarding school in a small suburb not too far from Satan City. The school was small; only three hundred students attended in all of grades ten through twelve, and only fifty students per year were granted admission. _

Miya placed a plate of pancakes in front of the enraged teen. "You know, it _is_ called the Wilton Academy for _Boys_," Miya commented lightly. "Not the Wilton Academy for Boys and Videl Satan."

Videl banged her glass of orange juice so hard on the table it splashed all over her white t-shirt. "How sexist is that?! I bet I'm smarter than three-_quarters_ of those guys. It just isn't fair," Videl whined. "It's one of the best schools in the world and I should be going there.  Well, it's lucky I have a back up plan," Videl smirked, pulling out another envelope. "I ended up taking the exam anyway."

"And how in the world did you manage that?" Miya wasn't sure if she wanted to know the answer. Had Videl blackmailed someone again? The dean?  Faculty members?  President of the student council?  Or maybe she had beaten up an alumni?  Oh, dear…

Videl grinned triumphantly, crossing her legs. "I took the exam under the alias 'Lucian Satan', second cousin to the great Mr. Satan. The exam proctor saw the family resemblance and didn't even ask for identification. Of course, I _did_ have to dress up like a boy and wear a baseball cap and these local girls started flirting with me… but whatever. I had to know if I could have gotten in."

"You got in, didn't you?" Miya asked wearily, wiping up the spilled orange juice with a sponge.

Videl poked her index fingers together. "You know, this is going to sound crazy—"

"No, no. Let me guess. You want to dress as a boy and go an all male high school, don't you?"

Videl blinked. "How _do_ you do that?" 

"Never mind that," Miya sat down, looking rather pale. "How are you going to convince your father to let you go? He'd rather drop dead than have you go to an ALL BOYS school."

Videl pulled a brochure out from behind her acceptance letter. It had only taken her thirty minutes in Photoshop and it was quite good, if she did say so herself. "I told him that I'm going to an all girls boarding school in Switzerland. With his book tour coming up, he'll be too preoccupied to notice that that Olga's Finishing School for Young Ladies is actually a cheese factory." Videl rolled her eyes, fanning herself with the brochure. "He cried for a few hours about how I'm leeeeeeaving him all alooooone, but he couldn't pass up a chance for me to spend the next two years with no boys in sight."

"… you really want to go through with this?" Miya asked weakly. "I guess I can't stop you. You'll just run off and do it anyway. We'll have to prepare properly. You'll need to cut and dye your hair of course, or else everyone will recognize the daughter of the most famous man in the world. You'll need new clothes. Dear me, do they even made men's clothes in your size?" Videl scowled at the crack about her small stature. Okay, so she was only five foot nothing and about a hundred and ten pounds dripping wet, but it was all muscle! "Maybe we can find you a pair of glasses with fake lenses."

Videl sighed as Miya dragged her out of the house to go to the mall. "The things I do for my education."

---

Videl crammed the last of her luggage into the trunk of her silver Mercedes SL55 AMG convertible, wondering for the millionth time if this was the right thing to do. "Well it's too late to back out now, Satan," she whispered, looking at her reflection in the side view mirror. She barely recognized herself with her new pixie-like hair cut, and Miya had insisted on dyeing large chunks of it red. Her bangs brushed against the top of her black, plastic framed, oval shaped glasses. She was wearing a charcoal gray sweater that was at least two sizes too big and fell to the middle of her thighs, with baggy khaki pants that Miya had to hem and take in, even though they were the smallest size the store had carried. She was happy she could still wear her favorite black boots and even agreed to wear a masculine looking silver chain around her neck.

"Videl, I must say that you make one beautiful boy.  You better call me as soon as you get there," Miya put her arms around Videl, squeezing tightly. "Are you sure you don't want me to go with you and help you unpack?"

Videl shook her head and got into her car. "I'll be okay."

"I know."

"Bye," Videl revved the engine.

"Don't forget to buy extra cloth for your chest bindings."

"Okay, Miya."

"And don't forget to change your underwear every day!"

"Miya!!!"

"I love you, dear."

"Miya…"

Videl gave one final wave to her surrogate mother before heading off to meet her newest challenge head on.

Go to school with three hundred boys and survive without getting caught.

Three tedious hours of traffic and three water bottles later, she finally pulled up to the front gates of the impressive looking school. For a few minutes she could only gawk. The brick building had to have over ten stories, and looked more like a castle in a fairy tale than a school for only three hundred students. There were two towers on either side of the school, and the roof was rigidly pointed towards the perfectly blue sky. The whole effect looked gothic and old, but beautiful and mysterious. "I thought I was going to high school, not Hogwarts," she commented dryly. Upon further inspection, she found there were over five tennis courts, three basketball courts, an outdoor swimming pool, and a baseball diamond that some major league teams would kill to have. Videl had never seen grass so green before. She concluded it was probably fake, because these people probably didn't want weeds growing in their _perfect_ grass. Augh. Snobs.

"Now, time to get to my room. I bet this place doesn't even have elevators," Videl slung her computer bag over her shoulder and encapsulated the rest of her luggage and car.  She made her way through the gold plaited double doors, past the large white marble white columns to the enormous lobby, feeling a little lost. "This place is a maze," she rubbed her temples.  "Excuse me," Videl gestured towards a security officer who sat behind a large mahogany desk. 

"Can I help you?" The man raised an eyebrow at Videl. The boys coming into school were starting to look younger and younger these days. Not to mention… prettier? This kid had fairy-like features, with magnificent large blue eyes and long, long lashes that would make any girl envious.  His porcelain skin looked smooth to the touch. The officer watched in amusement as some of the boys stopped to stare at the new boy; mid-semester transfer students were rare, especially ones as interesting as this one.

"Can you tell me where room 2S would be located?" the new boy asked politely in his strong, high voice. Videl was feeling uncomfortable with the way the officer and some of the students were looking at her and she wanted to get to her room as soon as possible. And take a shower for a few hours.

He stood up, pointing up to a large spiral staircase. "Go up one flight and hang right. It's the last room on the floor, Mr…?"

"Satan," Videl supplied, trying not to look surprised at the honorific. This was going to take some getting used to. "Lucien Satan."

The man gave Videl a smile that sent a chill down her spine. "Well, Mr. Satan, if you ever need anything, feel free to ask me. My name is Officer Rob."

"Um… thank you," Videl fairly ran up to her room, thoroughly squicked at Officer Rob's behavior. She was a boy! Kind of.  But still! Eew! She walked through the maroon carpeted hallways, noting the expensive paintings, the trophy cases and banners that colored the white walls. She passed what she gathered to be a living room of some sort, with a few vending machines, large leather couches, video games, a huge television, DVD player, and some pinball machines. 

She finally got to her own room, blinking as she stared at the door. "Son and Satan? _What_?! I was supposed to get a single room!" She threw open the door, ready to yell at whoever this Son person was to get the hell out of her room.

"Hello," said the most handsome boy Videl had ever seen in her life.  He was currently sitting at an old computer, tinkering with it's hard drive, screwdriver in hand. He was very tall, at least two inches over six feet, and must have weighed in at least two hundred and thirty pounds of pure muscle. He had spiky, gravity defying black hair and matching eyes. "You must be my new roommate. I'm Gohan Son." The room itself was a nice size for two people, with dark blue carpeting, two beds on either side of the wall with two large windows separating them, two closets, two desks and two small dressers. Gohan's side of the room was painfully neat, with his bed actually made and no clothes to speak of on the floor or hanging off of his chair. His laundry basket was actually used too!

_Oh my God. Just my luck. The hottest guy on the planet is my roommate, which makes him doubly off limits. Why does that just make me want him more? SAY SOMETHING! He's talking to you!!! _

"Hi," she said smoothly, dropping her laptop case on her bed and taking his hand, her hand seeming to disappear in his large ones. Oooh, firm grip too. "Lucien Satan. Call me Luke. I hope you don't think I'm being rude but—"  _Can I see you without a shirt on?_

"Let me guess," Gohan laughed dryly. 

_Let's hope my new roomie isn't a mind reader._

"You thought you were getting a single and yet, you're stuck with me." Videl raised an eyebrow at this. "Sorry.  The new guy always gets stuck with the guy that's here on scholarship."

Videl stared. "You're here on scholarship?"

_Oh great, Gohan thought, watching Videl's reaction to his last statement. __Another snob who is going to look down on me. And here I thought I might actually get a nice, normal roommate. "Yeah."_

"Thank God," Videl started opening her capsules, pulling the luggage to the floor. She started with her bedding, carefully pulling on her navy blue sheets and then her pillow cases. 

Gohan did a double take. This Luke Satan _wasn't disgusted in the least he was here with a poor boy who was here on a "free ride" as he had so often been called. "I'm sorry?"_

"I'm so glad you're not one of those snotty, preppy, rich guys who think the biggies in life are expensive cars, clothes, and how much Daddy is paying off the lawyer who got him off for indecent exposure when he had a bit too much to drink," Videl smoothed out her heavy comforter and started unpacking her clothes.

Gohan grinned widely. "I think this arrangement is going to work out just fine," Gohan concluded as his computer sparked at him angrily. "Argh… stupid piece of junk…" 

Videl couldn't agree more with both statements. Her roommate was a generally nice guy, as far as she could tell. "So, Gohan Son," Videl pulled out her laptop and placed it on her desk. "Tell me about yourself."

Gohan kicked his computer slightly, wincing as smoke rose from the DVD-rom. "I live with my parents and my eight year old brother, Goten, when I'm not at school. I live a few hundred miles from Satan City. Mt. Paozu, actually. My mother has primed me to be a scholar for as long as I can remember. We're not particularly rich, so when I got this scholarship, it was opportunity of a life time." He turned his gaze to the computer that was on his roommate's desk. His mouth dropped open. "Is that the IBM ThinkPad T40?!" Gohan approached the machine, with stars in his eyes. "It has a 1.6GHz Pentium M processor, 512MB, 80GB, CD-RW/DVD, Windows XP Pro…"

"Do you want one?" Videl asked casually, setting her television on a small stand in between her and Gohan's beds. "By the way, can you see this from your bed?"

Gohan gaped at her. "Do I want a computer like this? Of course, but they're so expensive, I'd have to sell a kidney or two to pay for one," he said wistfully.

"No kidneys necessary," Videl threw a capsule at him, trying to adjust the television. "Maybe I should put it against the wall…?"

Gohan caught the capsule, cocking his head to the side. He opened it and lo and behold, a replica of her black and silver laptop was in his hands. "I can't take this…" he said regrettably, cursing his pride. Why didn't he take a computer from Bulma when he had the chance? He probably looked like a charity case now.

"It's okay," Videl said absently, nodding at the television which could be seen by both her and Gohan. She walked towards her closet and started pulling out hangers. "I always carry extra."

"Extra what?"

"Everything," she revealed. "I'm an only child, so it's kind of nice to have someone to share things with. Really, take it. I don't think old faithful over there is going to make it through midterms," Gohan's Packard Bell sparked in response.

Gohan's eyes softened. "Thank you," he said, unable to refuse his roommate.

"If you need anything, just ask," Videl put her hand on her chin thoughtfully, considering her closet space and how much needed to go into her small dresser. "Really." Videl gave him a small smile and then turned back to her closet.

_Thank you GOD, Gohan praised silently, feeling unbelievably lucky to have a such a nice, generous, and beautiful roommate. He paused. Did he think beautiful? Guys just weren't supposed to be beautiful. Handsome, yes, cute, on occasion, but beautiful? __Okay, Gohan. All this excitement over the new computer is making you a little delirious. You've have a long day--_

"—ope you don't mind my posters of Jet Li," Videl turned her piercing gaze to Gohan. "I'm a big fan," she grinned, making his insides squirm slightly.

_Must. Get. Sleep."Mind? No, of course not. You're into martial arts?" Gohan asked amicably. _

"You could say that."

_Could this guy get anymore perfect? Gohan thought, a little anxiously. "You're a lot better then some of the other roommates I had during my freshmen year," Gohan offered, still staring._

Videl felt his eyes on her as she taped up her last poster, but tried to ignore it. "Really?"

"My last roommate was so messy. I called him Mr. Messy.  Well, not out loud, but I may as well have. There were clothes everywhere, food in places you would never expect to find food… needless to say we had a bug problem," Gohan shuddered at the memory. "I'm so glad you're neat," he gazed at her side of the room, which was as spotless as his. "And you actually use your drawers for things other than dirty magazines and cream cheese. It's such a nice change."

Videl threw her head back and laughed. Her laugh was a nice sound, Gohan realized. It was the kind of laugh that made others want to smile when they heard it. "So, who was before Mr. Messy?"

"There was Bible Boy."

"Oh man…"

Gohan laid back on his bed, hands behind his head. "I swear, I was hearing Hail Marys in my sleep. And everything I did was one sin or another," Gohan rolled his eyes. "Every time I sat down to eat I would get the 'why gluttony was one of the worst sins' speech."

Videl walked around his side of the room, looking at a few of the pictures he kept on his desk. Her eyes landed on one of him and another girl, with long auburn hair and deep green eyes. Gohan had his arms around her from behind. "Cute girl. Girlfriend?"

"Yeah," Gohan replied. "That's Lime. We've been dating since the beginning of my freshman year. She lives in town."

Videl nodded, kicked off her shoes, and flopped onto her bed. All this male bonding was making her tired.  "We're allowed to go out for our meals if you don't want to eat in the cafeteria. Want to go get a burger or something at five?" Gohan asked as Videl placed her glasses on the night stand and closed her eyes.

"Yeah," she whispered, drowsiness finally taking over. "Wake me if I'm not up by then."

Gohan sat on his bed, idly flipping through his AP Calculus textbook, but couldn't get his brain to concentrate on the material in front of him. He sighed and sat Indian style on his bed and resigned to watching his new roommate sleep. Videl had curled up slightly, one arm slung over her waist and the other resting on her pillow by her face. _He just looks so… female, Gohan thought, unable to tear his eyes away. _So small and… female. Not weak though, his ki is pretty strong. Just… pretty. How can a guy be pretty?! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!  Okay, Gohan, relax. No need to get upset. So you think your new roommate is pretty. What's the big deal? It means nothing. You're just observing the obvious. The painfully obvious. That's settled. Wonderful. Good. Great. __

_Not so great._

Gohan nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard the phone ring and Videl stir slightly in her slumber. He grabbed the phone, nearly tearing it off of the wall. "Hello?" he whispered, not wanting to wake his roommate.

"Gohan, why are you whispering?" Lime asked curiously. 

"My new roommate," Gohan replied in a low voice. "He's sleeping and I don't want to wake him up."

Lime laughed. "You're so considerate, Gohan. So, is he the roommate from hell, or what?"

"No, he's actually," s_trangely attractive_, "decent."

Lime laughed again. "That's really great. So. Dinner. Tonight. My place?"

Gohan chewed on his lower lip. While it sounded quite inviting… he absently looked over at his roommate who had managed to throw two of his pillows off of the bed and shove herself into the crevice between the wall and the bed. "I can't tonight. I'm going out to dinner with Luke."

"On a first name basis already? Gohan, should I be worried?" Lime teased.

Gohan nearly dropped the phone. "W-what?" 

"That was a joke, dear. Have fun and call me later."

"Okay, bye." Click.

Gohan smacked himself across the face for good measure. "Shower. I'll take a nice, normal shower and when I come out, everything will be alright." He quickly stepped into the bathroom, turning on the water, hoping it drowned out the sounds of him banging his head on the wall.

Videl opened her eyes and gazed around at the unfamiliar surroundings. Oh. That's right. She was at school, as a male. Videl stretched her arms over her head, moaning slightly as she heard a joint in her shoulder pop. She plucked her glasses from the night stand and put them on, wondering where Gohan had gone. "Shower," she mumbled, hearing the sound of running water. 

Just then, as if the illustrate the story in her head about Gohan's shower, Gohan walked out of the bathroom, still dripping, with only a flimsy blue towel around his waist. Videl couldn't help it; she stared. She had never considered herself a hormonal teenager but damn it all, she was only human. From his chiseled biceps to his sculpted chest down to his muscular abdomen to his—

"Sorry, did I wake up?" he asked casually, as if he didn't know she was currently lost in her Gohan filled fantasies.

Videl managed to shake her head.

"Are you getting sick? Your face looks a little red," Gohan asked, his dark eyes flashing with concern.

Oh _fuck_. He was dripping, half naked, and being sensitive. Why couldn't she have met him when she was allowed to be a girl and drool properly over him!? She nearly keeled over as his towel drooped slightly on his left hip. Videl, remember that she was supposed to have values, closed her eyes as she heard him readjust the towel.

"Hey, are you sure you're all right?"

"I just have a slight headache," she answered, still not opening her eyes. 

She briefly heard the floor creak as he bent down to pick up something.

Suddenly she wasn't quite so hungry anymore.

---

Videl groaned as she tried to strangle herself with her tie. Augh. Uniforms. One of the serious downfalls of private education. The uniform itself wasn't bad; the winter uniform consisted a black, button down long sleeved shirt that was lined with white along the bottom, collar, and sleeves. She wore black pants underneath and a pair of white shoes. And a white tie. That _damn tie. Was it her fault she never needed to wear one before? "ARGH! FUCK! I hate this thing!!!" She flung her tie over her head in frustration. Screw the tie._

"You'll probably need this," Gohan said good naturedly, holding out the tie Videl just threw in his direction. He was already dressed and looking quite striking in his uniform, Videl noted, trying not to stare. "Need some help?"

Videl laughed sheepishly. "I'm terrible with these things," she said helplessly.

Gohan put his hands on her shoulders and guided her in front of the mirror that hung above his dresser. He stood behind her and reached down to wrap the tie losing around the back on her neck. He smirked at the way he towered over his petit roommate. "I've never done this for someone else before," he said cheerily.

Videl tried to contain the blush that was threatening to paint her cheeks, but to no avail. This was _so_ not fair. Was she being punished for lying and impersonating a member of the opposite sex? Why couldn't she have a roommate who watched Teletubbies and had horrible B.O. or something? But noooo, she had to be stuck with the world's most perfect man who had a great body, was nice, intelligent, and was—

She stiffened.

Did he just _sniff_ her hair!?

No. She just imagined it. She _had_ to have imagined it. Although she was new at this boy thing, she gathered that boys did not generally sniff other guys hair. Period. Unless… unless…

No.

He couldn't possibly…

Be attracted to her…

Could he?

Under normal circumstances, Videl would have been _very flattered that such a nice guy had just taken a whiff of her hair. But—but—she was supposed to be a boy for God's sake! And that would mean…_

Was Gohan attracted to her as a boy!?

But he had a _girlfriend_! 

Okay. It was just an accident. Maybe he just moved his head and he grazed her hair.

Fine.

Cool.

She would have to look into this later.

"We should hurry," Gohan glanced down at his watch. "You don't want to be late on your first day, do you?"

Videl grabbed her blue book bag and slung it over one shoulder. "Thanks Mom," she answered dryly, following Gohan out into the hall and locking the door behind her. Her palms started sweating as the class room approached. Would people actually buy that she was a boy? Gohan had fallen for it, but he seemed like a naïve kid who would believe anything she told him. The guidance counselor, administrator's office, and head master had fallen for it as well, although they had all given her some strange looks. As she walked out of the head master's office the day before, she heard his secretary mutter how the new boy was prettier than most girls she knew. And yes, she saw how the boys in the hall were looking at her. She wasn't sure if she should be flattered, or frightened.

"Well, I'll see you in class," Gohan gave her a small wave before jogging into class.

Videl nervously shifted her weight back and forth between her feet. She had never felt so scared in her life. One slip and she would ruin everything she had worked so hard for. _Be calm and confident, _she took a deep breath as she heard the teacher command for her to enter. She walked in, her head held high and strode to the front of the room with her usual grace and confidence. "This is Lucien Satan, second cousin to the our hero, Mr. Satan. His entrance exam showed he scored in the top one percentile, so we're in luck boys. We have a student who actually knows how to read. I know you will all treat him with the proper respect," the teacher, a tall, broad shouldered man with short dark hair and silver eyes drawled, in a bored tone.

"I'm Luke Satan," she said, trying to lower her voice an octave without sounding ridiculous.  "It's nice to meet you." 

"You may sit wherever you like," Mr. Anderson yawned. "I really couldn't care less."

Videl ignored the whispers as she walked up towards the fifth row and sat on the end, to the left of Gohan. "Man, can you believe the new kid?" she heard a tall blond boy in the row above her whisper. "He's so tiny. He looks like a complete wimp."

"I don't know," a lithe boy with gold eyes whispered back. "He actually looks a little intimidating."

_Smart boy, Videl thought. _It would be stupid to mess with me.__

"I think he's positively delectable. Look at that shiny, healthy hair, smooth, alabaster skin, and those incredibly gorgeous blue eyes," another boy whispered. "Don't you think so, Marker, dear?"

"You frighten me sometimes, Ari.  You know that?"

Videl was inclined to agree. She didn't quite like where that conversation was going.

"Hey," Gohan whispered to her, leaning closer to her. "Looks like we'll be spending a lot of time together. Hope you don't mind."

"It could be worse. I could be stuck with that blond asshole," Videl whispered to herself. Videl shook her head towards Gohan, taking out a note book and a pencil as Mr. Anderson droned on and on about sins and cosine. "I think this will be an interesting year," Videl replied, throwing a glare back at the tall blond boy. He would most certainly be dealt with later. 

Five hours and four boring teachers later, everyone breathed a sigh of relief as the bell rang at around one for lunch to begin.  She was a transfer student, and that meant she was going to have to work her ass off to catch up on the eight weeks of school she had missed.  She was already exhausted.  "I'm in the mood for ice cream," Videl admitted as she and Gohan walked outside towards the student union, where the others were gathering for lunch. "I'm thinking a hot fudge sundae with rocky road ice cream. A really, really big one. With every topping."

"Even Gummy Bears?" Gohan asked playfully.

Videl smacked him over the head with her binder. "What's wrong with Gummy Bears?" she demanded.

"They don't belong on ice cream," Gohan insisted, laughing as Videl continued to glare at him.

"Then why do the ice cream shops offer them as toppings, huh?! Answer that one, smart ass!" Videl poked her finger into his chest accusingly. "You're nothing but an ice cream elitist!"

Gohan choked. "I am not! Fine, fine, have your Gummy Bears. Who am I to stop you from your happiness? Even if it is completely disgusting," he tried not to grin as she growled at him and raised her binder again.

"Well, well, well," a strong voice said from behind them, interrupting Videl mid-smack. "What do we have here? Gohan Son has found a friend," Videl spun around only to find herself face to face with the tall blond boy who was whispering about her during class.  Tagging along behind him was a thin boy with messy light brown hair and gold eyes and another boy with striking emerald eyes and long black hair tied back into a low pony tail.  Both seemed much nicer than the blond, but she didn't quite like the way the green-eyed one was leering at her.  "Aren't you going to introduce us, Gohan?"

"No," Gohan said curtly. 

He threw his head back and laughed. Videl resisted the strong urge to kick his ass. "My name is Sharpner."

"Congratulations," Videl commented dryly. 

Sharpner looked down at the girl, sneering. "So, you come with a name or just an attitude?"

Videl rolled her eyes. The teacher had only introduced her to the class hours before and this buffoon hadn't even bothered to learn her name? He was just trying to be witty, Videl realized. Well, Mr. Walking Blond Joke had another thing coming. "Just an attitude."

"And people find this charming?" Sharpner asked as his two friends snickered behind him.

Videl shrugged. "I haven't asked."

"Well I find it _very charming," the leering boy stepped in front of Sharpner, clasping Videl's hands in his. "Hello, my name is Aritomo, age sixteen, president of the drama club," Ari winked at her. "But call me Ari. All my friends do," he purred.  She detangled their hands, wondering for the millionth time what kind of school she was attending._

The sandy haired boy put out his hand to her. "I'm Marker. Ignore these two guys; they're just idiots."  Videl hesitantly shook his hand. He seemed normal enough. "Gohan, we're heading towards the pizza place. Do you and your new roomie want to come?"

"I'll pass," Videl answered in a bored tone, her lip curling as her gaze landed on Sharpner. "I'm allergic."

Sharpner cocked a fair eyebrow at her. "To pizza?"

"No," Videl met gaze in a silent challenge. "To stupidity. Specifically, yours. I'll let you in on a little secret… Sharpner, was it? You're supposed to stop the Q-Tip when there's resistance."

"Hey you—" Sharpner grabbed her arm roughly, which really was a stupid thing to do. Before he could react, she kicked him square in the face, making him lose consciousness completely even before he hit the floor.

Videl brushed off her arm and pushed her glasses up her nose. "Does anyone else have a problem?" Gohan could have sworn the entire student body just took a step back. "Because I'll be more than happy to straighten it out for you. No? Okay then. Coming, Gohan?"

Marker watched as the two disappeared out the front gates of the school, the student body clearing a path for them. "Whoa. That guy can really kick. And he didn't even break a sweat."

"The only thing he broke was Sharpner's nose," Ari pulled Sharpner to his feet, slapping his cheeks lightly. "Come now, sweetheart. Upsie daisy!"

Sharpner groaned, putting a hand on his currently bleeding nose. "Fuck. That really hurt!" Sharpner accepted a flowered handkerchief from Ari. 

"He said he couldn't participate in gym because of chronic asthma problems and he couldn't exert himself," Marker took a swig of his soda, sitting down on a picnic table. "But now here he is, kicking Sharpner in the face."

Sharpner tipped his head back trying to stop the massive blood loss. "So, he's not telling everyone something. That means it's something he doesn't want us to know."

"Good work Nancy Drew," Ari rolled his eyes and opened his vanilla yogurt. "You know, honey, it's amazing. A personality like yours and you _still_ can't get any dates."

Sharpner frowned at him, throwing the bloody handkerchief to the ground. "Even more amazing: personality like yours and you can!"

Ari patted him on the head. "Oh, honey. You're simple, you're shallow and you're a common whore. That's why we're soul mates, love!" Sharpner swatted his hand away and accepted a bottle of water from Marker. "Just leave that Luke boy alone. He's too cute to hate."

"Fine, I'll be civil. But I will find out what he's hiding," Sharpner swore, slamming his fist on the table. "You can be sure of that."

-----

**Preview for Chapter 2**: A Tangled Web 

"Bulma?" Gohan asked timidly.

"Well," Bulma said after downing her first shot of Grey Goose.  Vegeta looked over at her in amusement.  "I think your friend is going though what a lot of young people go through. He's confused about his sexuality—" 

Vegeta turned blue as he choked on a rather large chicken bone. He quickly guzzled down a glass of water, trying to dislodge it from his throat. He hadn't heard right.  He couldn't have heard right.  After all, he still had much to learn about this earth lingo. She could have meant a lot of things. Vegeta continued drinking his water, ignoring Bulma's venomous looks. 

"He might or might not be gay or bisexual—" 

Vegeta spat out his water, spraying the table with the liquid. That he understood perfectly. Bulma and Gohan exchanged a few more words and finally Bulma hung up.

"So Kakkarot's first brat is a queer," Vegeta said bluntly as Bulma began to drink straight from the bottle.  "Who _else_ saw this one coming a lightyear away?"  


	2. Chapter 2: A Tangled Web

Videl Satan has the looks, smarts, talent and money to get her almost anywhere... except for Wilton Academy, a top rated boy's boarding school.  What's a girl to do?  Cross dress, of course!  And, as an added bonus, she gets to throw her new roommate into a whirlwind of sexual confusion and insanity.

A/N: Some stolen lines from "Will and Grace". Come on, you KNOW Ari is just a teenage version of Jack, right? -^_^-

Ari: *putting his thumbs and index fingers together, forming a box around his face* Always Ari! 

Everyone in the universe: *sigh*

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**Someone to Know Me**  
By: CCS Angel00   
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Chapter 2: A Tangled Web  
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_Never chase a lie. Let it alone, and it will run itself to death.   
--Lyman Beecher_

"I know your secret," Gohan stated, a few hours after they had finished their ice cream and had gone back to their room. They had changed out of their uniforms and were relaxing. Gohan was playing around with his new computer, while Videl was trying to coerce him into playing her Game Cube with her.

Videl tensed, almost dropping her controller. As soon as they had gotten back to the room, she had changed into a pair of loose black sweatpants and a very baggy white tee-shirt that hid her form pretty well, in her opinion. "My... secret?"  How had he figured it out? Had he caught her openly ogling him? _Okay, time to put all those _Law and Order_ episodes to good use. Deny, deny, deny._ "I don't have any secrets, Gohan," she smiled weakly, trying to concentrate on her video game.

Gohan crossed his arms over his broad chest. "I saw that kick you gave Sharpner, Luke. You're a … third degree black belt?"

Videl let out the breath she didn't know she was holding. "Fourth actually. Gohan, please don't tell anyone," she pleaded, her eyes shaking slightly. "They'll make me take gym and I--" _Can't be seen undressed in front of boys, "I have this fear," she tried playing the sympathy card, pouting and looking like an injured kitten._

"Fear?" Gohan whispered, looking concerned.

_Bingo. "I have this fear of… of… seeing other people naked. It got so bad in my previous school that after only two weeks of gym and being in the locker room, I had to see a therapist for six months to get over the trauma. But I was too embarrassed to say anything like that on the medical form," Videl bit her lip, trying to look vulnerable. Nice guys like Gohan ate that stuff up. _

"Wow. I had no idea. Well, you don't want to get out of shape, do you? You can use our room any time to practice, if you want," Gohan offered. "By the way, just what are you taking instead of gym?"

Videl blew her long bangs out of her face as she beat the computer player for the tenth time in three hours. "They're making me play the piano for the chorus. They meet three times a week for an hour every morning, it's a pretty good deal."

"You play the piano?" Videl nodded. "Can I hear you play sometime?" Videl's answer was interrupted by the sound of the telephone ringing.

"I'll get it," Videl dropped her controller, leapt off of her bed, and jogged towards the phone that hung by Gohan's desk. "Hello?"

"Um... I think I have the wrong number," a feminine voice answered hesitantly.

Videl frowned. "Who are you looking for?" She shrugged at Gohan's questioning look.

"Gohan Son."

"Oh, he's right here. Gohan," she held the phone out to him. "It's for you."

Gohan grabbed the phone. "Hello? Oh, that was my roommate. Yeah," Gohan snuck a peek at Videl as she pulled a soda out of their mini-fridge, lowering his voice to a whisper. "That's what I thought when I first met him, too. Tonight? I... guess so... if Luke doesn't mind." Gohan put his hand over the receiver. "Do you mind if my girlfriend comes over and hangs out for awhile? She really wants to meet you."

Videl took a swig of her drink and raised a thin eyebrow. "You're allowed to bring girls up here?"

"Technically... no."

"Gohan Son, I'm shocked. I'm appalled. And I'm very, very proud of you, boy. Of course I want to meet her," Videl grinned as Gohan blushed. "Tell her to tell Officer Rob that she's coming to see me. He'll let her up for sure."

Gohan blinked. "You already made friends with the security officers?"

"How else are we going to sneak out after hours?" Videl asked impatiently. "Now tell her. Should we order a few pizzas? Hm, maybe I should be polite and invite that Marker guy. He seemed nice enough. But would that mean I'd have to invite the other two weirdoes?" Videl wondered out loud, as Gohan relayed the message to Lime. Videl pulled out a few pizza place menus, and started scanning them over.

Gohan hung up the phone. "I don't think we're allowed to order in food."

"Well, technically we're not supposed to be up after lights out with a girl in our room, so I guess it's a little late to start following the rules. How does five pies, two plain, three with pepperoni sound? Oh, I'll just wait until I talk to the Three Stooges and see what they want. By the way, what room are they in?"

"Marker and Ari are in 216, just down the hall and Sharpner is in 211. Want me to come with you?" Gohan offered, feeling a bit dizzy from breaking all these rules. The roommate would be the death of him.

Videl closed the top of her soda and stuck it back in the fridge. "Nah. I'll be right back. In the meantime, go into my black CD case over there and pick out a few DVDs we can watch tonight." Videl wandered down the endless hallway, looking fervently for 216 or 211, whichever came first. She stopped directly in front of 216 and hesitantly knocked on the door. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Maybe these two guys didn't like her either. Well FINE, if they turned her down, it was their loss.

"Who is it?" Marker called and Videl heard soft footsteps coming towards the door. The door swung open to reveal a very surprised Marker. "Luke? What brings you here? Do you want to come in?" Videl peered into the doorway, finding a darkly colored room filled with poster's and paintings and playbills and some male Calvin Klein underwear models on the walls. There were quite a few trophies and plaques for films and performance art. Ah. So Marker was a director. Interesting. Videl filed that away for later use. And Ari was... on the black rug, doing some sort of weird exercise which mainly involved his ass, Videl guessed, paling slightly. 

"Um... no thanks. I just came to invite you and Ari to hang out with me, Gohan, and his girlfriend tonight. We're ordering in pizza and watching movies so I thought would see if you guys wanted in."

Marker nodded enthusiastically. "Having girls up and ordering out? Luke Satan, I'd say you are having quite an effect on Gohan. He's too stuffy to break rules. He's all 'I can get kicked out because I'm of scholarship' blah blah blah. He doesn't get that the teachers all get wasted after five anyway. Well anyway, sounds like fun. I'm in. Ari?"

Ari sauntered over to them, pushing up his sweatband and slinging a towel over his shoulder. Videl bit her lip to keep from laughing at his wildly colored stretch pants and off the shoulder, 80's style sweater. "Gentlemen, fresh from 45 minutes of butt-robics, I give you my ass." He did a little twirl, his long, dark pony tail falling over his right shoulder. "And yes, I would loooove to spend a night with you, Luke." He batted his emerald eyes at her, trying to look innocent.

Videl finally let out her laugh. This guy was going to be a _very disappointed. "I'm off to go and sort things out with Sharpner," Marker raised a golden eyebrow. "I promise, no violence this time. "_

"Sharpner isn't so bad," Marker revealed. "You just saw Jackass-Sharpner."

"Jackass-Sharpner?"

"One of the many faces of Sharpner. There's drunk-and-belligerent-Sharpner, there's sober-and-belligerent-Sharpner, there's creepy-and-horny-Sharpner. The rarest of them all is sweet-Sharpner, but that's usually accompanied by hidden-agenda-Sharpner." Marker paused. "So, what time is this party starting?"

"Come over at around seven. Bye guys," Videl waved to them, noting Ari's disappointed look at her exit. She trudged towards Sharpner's room, swallowing her pride. She had to try to be friendly, or she could come off as suspicious. Plus, she really didn't need any enemies on her ass while she was here. "Sharpner?" She called.

"Oh," the door unlocked. "It's Jackie Chan. To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit? Coming to give me a concussion to go along with my broken nose?"

Videl bit down a nasty retort. "I'm sorry about kicking you," Sharpner blinked in surprise. "I'm trying to repent here; seven 'o clock, my room. Movies, pizza, four guys and Gohan's girlfriend. How does that sound?"

"I guess I was _probably_ out of line too," Sharpner leaned on the door frame. "Yeah. Okay. Not like I have anything better to do anyway."

"Why am I not surprised?" Videl muttered under her breath, pushing her glasses up her nose. "Okay then. See you." Videl marched back to her room, her eyebrow twitching. "Asshole." She opened up the door to her room, and tromped towards the phone, dialing before Gohan could get in a word. "Peppy's Pizza?  I'd like five large and one medium plain pizzas delivered to the Wilton Academy for Boys.  Just leave them with the security guard downstairs. Thank you."

"Where are you going now?" Gohan demanded, as Videl rushed towards the door once more. 

"I'm going to give the money to the delivery boy and bribe Officer Rob with pizza. Oh shit, I forgot about drinks. Do we have enough in the fridge?" Videl sighed with relief as Gohan nodded. "Okay, be back in a few."

Gohan shook his head. If his mother EVER found out about all these rules he was breaking… Oh and if she especially found out a girl was in his room, let alone that girl being his girlfriend… Man, the Teflon pans would be flying then. He had known Luke for less than forty eight hours and he was already breaking more rules with him than he ever had in his whole life. "This is going to be one crazy year," Gohan thought, shaking his head, but grinning none the less. 

If only he knew how true that was.

---

"Wow," Lime commented as she sat on her boyfriend's bed. It was six thirty, Videl was still downstairs, paying the delivery boy and the other guys had yet to show up.  "Your room looks great. That television is huge! I guess it pays to be in with the blue bloods. Gohan, when did you get a new computer?" Lime peered over at his desk, raising her eyebrow.

Gohan looked up from Videl's DVD collection. "Oh, Luke gave it to me."

"He just… gave it to you? For no reason?" She asked suspiciously.

"Um… pretty much, yeah," Gohan said absently, rifling through the DVDs once more. "He's a really nice guy, Lime. You'll like him. Stop looking so suspicious."

"You're right. You know, I've really missed you lately. We've been so busy…" Lime jumped up from the bed, put her hands on his face, and kissed him softly. He tried to kiss her back with as much enthusiasm, he really did, but when he closed his eyes all he could think about was a pair of blue eyes that were hidden behind glasses, not green. Someone slightly shorter, with short dark hair…

"Honestly," Gohan briefly heard someone mutter from the door, grateful for the distraction. "That Officer Rob scares the _shit_ out of me —" Videl kicked open the door with her foot, balancing five pizza boxes in her hands. She looked taken aback as she stared at the kissing couple. "I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?" she asked weakly, feeling slightly guilty for ruining their moment. She set the pizzas down on a small table in their room and gave them an apologetic smile. "Do you want me to just come back later — "

Gohan jumped up. "No, no. Not necessary," Lime frowned, glaring at her boyfriend. "Lime, this is Luke. Luke, Lime."

"Pleased to meet you," Videl held her hand out to the girl, giving her a friendly smile. Lime was indeed a very cute girl, with long auburn hair and attractive green eyes. She was a few inches taller than Videl and was wearing a green sweater that set off her eyes nicely.

Lime gave her a strained grin. "Likewise." _This was Gohan's roommate? _He_ was prettier than _she_ was! He was diminutive, like a sprite or something! And delicate!  This guy looked like he was made out of porcelain with that gorgeous complexion. Girls would KILL to look like this guy! Lime couldn't help but feel self-conscious standing next to someone so… so… ARGH! Life was just SO unfair!_

"Oh, just help yourself to some pizza before the others come and devour it all," Videl opened a box, handing Lime and Gohan plates. Lime's eyes drifted towards Luke's hands. They were tiny and feminine just like the rest of him. His nails were cut neatly, without a smidge of dirt under them. _What teenage guy keeps his nails that nice!? Lime thought with disbelief. _I guess the upper class has to keep themselves in top form at all times. __

Lime's views of the higher-ups were limited. They were all jerks, in her opinion. Some of Gohan's friends were okay, but most of the people in the school looked at her like she was some kind of trash. A townie, they called her. "So, you guys have been going out for a year?" Videl tried to make conversation as Lime continued to scrutinize her hands.

Lime looked away from Videl's hands and took a small bite of her pizza. "Yeah. We met at the library. I work there after school and on weekends. Gohan came in and wanted to take out no less than fifteen books."

Videl laughed, making Lime smile. She couldn't dislike this Luke Satan, even if she tried. He was really a nice, decent, normal guy. Not snobby at all. "That sounds like Gohan," Videl winked at Gohan, who averted his eyes to his pizza. 

"You guys started without us!" Ari exclaimed dramatically, bouncing into the room, wearing what looked to be an orange jail jumpsuit and was holding a red bag in his hands. 

Videl blinked at him as Marker and Sharpner came into the room. "And they say Tinky Winky was the only gay Teletubby! Maybe I inquire as to _why_ you're wearing that?"

"I'm trying to get into my part as Jean Valjean. We're performing Les Miserables, you know. You'll come see me in the show, won't you Luke? Won't you?" Ari's bright green eyes sparkled through tears.

Videl nodded enthusiastically. "I wouldn't miss it."

"Yay!"

"Hi Ari, Marker, Sharpner," Lime greeted. "I'm glad to see you guys haven't changed at all during the summer."

Ari eyed Lime thoughtfully. "Sweetheart, you look _good. I think someone has been developing. Oooh! Your breasts _have_ gotten bigger! Don't you think so, Gohan?" _

Gohan choked on his pizza, waving his hand in front of his burning mouth, struggling with a response. 

"Leave them alone, you pervert," Marker took two slices of pizza and set them on his plate. "So boys and girl, what will we be watching tonight?"

"I have the newest Inuyasha," Videl popped a DVD into the player, grabbing the remote. "We can watch that."

Everyone nodded in agreement, taking their places on either Gohan or Videl's beds. Gohan, Lime, and Sharpner sat on his bed while Videl, Marker, and Ari were on hers. After listening to the happy theme song (which was NOT Change the World, the first theme song which made Videl want to pull out all of her hair) there was a close-up on one of the villain's faces, Jakotsu, a man who was resurrected from the dead and had an intense, freaky, crush on Inuyasha. "Not only is Inuyasha cute, but that monk is _sooo_ sexy. I'd love to see his agonized face," Jakotsu leered, leaving everyone in the room in hysterics. 

"His gay-dar could not be any worse," Marker wheezed as Gohan turned fairly green.

There was another close-up of Jakotsu's hungry look. "Hmm… interesting sword you have there. Yours… or mine…"

"Nice double entendre," Videl choked out, watching Gohan turn all the colors of the rainbow. He looked like he was going to be sick any moment. _I knew I was crazy to think that he'd ever like a guy. Videl looked at Ari who was watching Jakotsu with an odd fascination. _

Lime giggled as Jakotsu yelled at Sango, the demon huntress not to interfere with his and Inuyasha's "fun". "Oh my. I guess he doesn't like women much."

"Can you blame him? Women," Ari commented. "Can't live with them… end of sentence." No one was surprised when Lime threw one of Gohan's pillows right in his face. "You be careful, dear," Ari whispered to Videl. "You live with a hetero long enough, you're going to catch it."

Videl nearly spat out her soda on Marker. "I'll keep that in mind, thanks."

"Man," Sharpner after four long hours of watching the anime. "Kagura is hot!" He was, of course, talking about the main villain's right hand girl, Kagura the wind user.

Ari shook his head fervently. "I hate her!"

"More than the know it all daughter on 'The Gilmore Girls'?" Lime asked sarcastically.

"Hum. I'll get back to you on that… Anyway, I think we should have a sleep over here! We have no classes tomorrow and neither does Lime, here--"

"Oh, we're are going to have a ball, braiding each other's hair and talking about boys and doing the Cosmo quiz," Sharpner rolled his eyes.

Ari stuck his tongue out at the blond. "Oh, you mean, like, 'How To Tell If Your Best Friend's a Bitch?' Yeah, I already took it. You are."

"Okay, everyone out. I need to get some much needed sleep," Videl commanded. Marker and Sharpner got the message and left quietly while Ari was blowing kisses to Videl and Gohan. "Gohan? Are you okay?" Gohan was still dry heaving in the corner from Jakotsu's rather vivid language.

"Fine," he said weakly. 

Videl looked at her roommate worriedly. "You should get to bed. I'll walk Lime home, okay?"

"You don't have to do that —" Lime tried to protest.

"No, it's fine. Maybe I should stop by the pharmacy and pick up some Pepto Bismal. Gohan, please try _not to throw up on the rug, if you can help it."_

"I make no promises," came the feeble reply.

Lime kissed her boyfriend on the forehead, petting his hair affectionately.. "Well, shall we?" Videl asked, grabbing her wallet from her dresser. "So, where do you live?" Videl asked once they got past Officer Rob (who winked and leered at both of them).

"Not far. About two blocks away. It was really nice of you to walk me home," Lime said. 

Videl shrugged, pushing her bangs out of her eyes. It was the "gentlemanly" thing to do, wasn't it? "I needed to pick up a few things at the pharmacy anyway. It's not a big deal."

"Gohan will be fine. He has a stomach of steel," Lime walked over a puddle.

Videl stuffed her hands in her pants pockets. "He eats at least ten times his weight in food every day and he still manages to keep that body," Videl tried to keep the worship out of her voice. "But I guess it was the gay implications of sadomasochism and bondage that did him in."

"He has a good body because he does martial arts.  Or used to, anyway," Lime said before she could help herself. 

"I thought so. You could tell by the way someone walks if they are martial artists or not," Videl stopped as a car passed in front of them. "He stopped doing martial arts, hm?"

Lime chose her words carefully. "When he was a child he practiced martial arts with his father, but his mother would have rather him become a scholar. In truth, I think that's what he wants, too. This is my stop. Thanks for walking me home, Luke. See you."

Videl watched the girl walk off and headed back toward her dorm, forgetting all about the pharmacy. "Maybe he doesn't like to talk about it," she thought out loud. "I probably should wait until he brings it up, then I'll ask more about him. I haven't exactly told him everything about me either," she smiled sardonically as a cool autumn wind chilled her to the bone. "But why would Lime tell me all that stuff? I just met Gohan…"

"Hi," Gohan greeted when she entered the room, looking much better than he did before she left. "Thanks for walking Lime home. I was really feeling nauseous there. Maybe it was something I ate before…?"

After changing into her pajamas and brushing her teeth, Videl stumbled over to her bed. "Lime's a nice girl," Videl yawned. 

"Yeah," Gohan agreed, shutting the light.

"So what's she doing with you?" Videl teased, setting her glasses on her night stand. "You're a rebel now. You've broken many, many rules. And this is only the beginning, my friend. We still have all year to break others…"

Gohan sighed and watched his roommate drift off to sleep. 

At least one of them was going to get to sleep that night.

---

The madness had to END.

Gohan hadn't had a full night's sleep in almost three weeks.

His eyes were rimmed with red, he was white as a ghost, and his hair looked like it devoured the last comb that dared to try and tame it.

And it was all his roommate's fault.

Luke wasn't particularly noisy, or even tried to wake him on purpose, but man, Gohan couldn't sleep a wink and it was all because of his inhumanly gorgeous roommate, who was constantly on his mind. In class, he stared at Luke, finding himself fascinated with the way the other boy would lean his chin on his hand or chew on the end of his pen when he was confused or even the way his eyes flashed blue fire when he was angry.

He would stare at Luke while Luke would do his martial arts _katas_ in the morning, unable to tear his gaze away from the lithe warrior for even a moment. He would stare at the way he was able to bend his body with ease and power and grace, his lips pressed in a firm line of determination.

Gohan didn't know why he was always staring.

It really made him very confused, about a lot of things, on a lot of levels.

Most of all, whenever his roommate would smile at him, he felt the blood rush to his face and his stomach would do funny things. The sound of Luke's laugh made his blood sing and he found himself relaxed and laughing along.

"That's all fine and well," Gohan said dryly, staring at the phone. "But what does it mean?" 

It wasn't that he was lonely, oh no, he had a very nice girlfriend who was smart, pretty, and nice but she just wasn't —

"Time to call the experts before I die of exhaustion," Gohan picked up his phone, for once feeling happy that Luke was off at chorus practice and he was alone in their room. He quickly dialed a familiar number, unsure of what he would even say. _Hi, Bulma. Yeah, everything is going well here, except, you know, I think I might have feelings for my male roommate. Be sure to tell Mom that she's going to have to depend on Goten if she really wants grandkids. By the way, could you send me another one of those care packages with the chocolate chip cookies —_

"What?" A gruff voice answered.

"Is Bulma there?" Gohan asked, trembling slightly.

"Who is that, Vegeta?" A feminine voice asked on the other line. He wordlessly gave her the phone and went off to do better things, such as stealing some chicken from the refrigerator. "Hello?"

"Hi, Bulma."

"Gohan! How are you?" Bulma asked, watching her husband take apart the fridge looking for his beloved fried chicken. She heard his hesitation. "Gohan? Is something wrong?"

"Are you alone?"

"Yes," Bulma lied, not really thinking Vegeta gave a damn what she was talking about. "What's up, kid?"

Gohan chose his words carefully. "I have this… friend."

"What about this friend?" Vegeta raised his eyebrow and set his chicken on the table before sitting down in front of it. Whatever, he had no time for this teenage drama, when he had more important things and people to deal with. Such as Colonial Sanders.

Gohan cleared his throat. "I have this friend. He had a girlfriend and stuff but… he thinks he might… have feelings for his other friend."

Bulma nodded, forgetting Gohan couldn't see her. "It happens all the time —" Okay, so Gohan had a crush on another girl while he was dating Lime. This wasn't so terrible —

"His friend is a guy."

Holy CATS. This was unexpected, to say the very, very least. Of course Bulma knew right off of the bat Gohan was talking about himself; it didn't take a genius to figure that one out. Was Gohan… could he be…?  Oy, she needed to sit down.  Or even better, walk over to the liquor cabinet and grab that bottle of Grey Goose she'd been saving.  Yes, that actually sounded like a _splendid_ idea!

"Bulma?" Gohan asked timidly.

"Well," Bulma said after quickly pouring and downing her first shot.  Vegeta looked over at her in amusement.. "I think your friend is going though what a lot of young people go through. He's confused about his sexuality — " 

Vegeta turned blue as he choked on a rather large chicken bone. He quickly guzzled down a glass of water, trying to dislodge it from his throat. He hadn't heard right.  He couldn't have heard right.  After all, he still had much to learn about this earth lingo. That could have meant a lot of things. Vegeta continued drinking his water, ignoring Bulma's venomous looks. 

"He might or might not be gay or bisexual — " 

Vegeta spat out his water, spraying the table with the liquid. That he understood _perfectly_. Bulma and Gohan exchanged a few more words and finally Bulma hung up.

Vegeta snorted.  "So Kakkarot's first brat is a queer. Who _else_ saw this one coming a light-year away?"

"Vegeta!!!"

Vegeta crossed his arms over his chest, looking quite determined. "I _so_ get to tell Kakkarot his kid is a fairy."

"VEGETA!"

Vegeta blinked, waking from his Kakkarot torture fantasies. "Hm?"

"You will tell no one that Gohan is confused!" Bulma hissed.

Vegeta grinned evilly, telephone in hand. "Oh, what's that?  I can't hear you, I'm talking to the television station."

"VEGETAAAAAAAA!!!"

Miles away Gohan smiled. "Man. I'm good. I bet Bulma had no idea I was talking about myself!"

---

"So you're helping Marker with a video documentary?" Videl asked, gathering the sheet music from the piano. Chorus practice had just ended and she was alone with Ari in the music room, since he had politely asked her to go for a bite to eat. "What's it on?"

Ari looked serious. "It's a hard hitting look at sexual harassment in the workplace."

Videl laughed so hard, her ribs started to ache. "I'm sorry, Ari. Sexual harassment? Starring the guy that asked his coworker at the Gap if he had two nipples for a dime?" Videl wheezed, clutching her stomach. 

Surprisingly, Ari started laughing with her. "You have a really nice laugh. It brightens your whole face."

Videl stopped laughing immediately, heat flooding her cheeks. "Um… thanks. You know, we really should get going—" Right now, she was painfully aware that they were alone in a deserted classroom and although she could kick his ass, she really didn't want to unless she HAD to. He was nice. A bit amorous, but nice.

"Wait," he grabbed her hand and pulled her towards him. "I was attracted to you the first moment I saw you. You're nice, cute, smart, and funny and I think I really like you…" Videl froze as he put a pale hand on her cheek and leaned down to kiss her, closing the space and finally crushing his lips to hers. She panicked, nearly flailing, and did the only think she could think of.

She slapped him.

HARD.

Ari stepped back, surprised. He wasn't sure if he was more surprised by the kiss or by the slap. He put his hand to his cheek tentatively. "You…" he started, his lovely eyes widening in surprise. "You…"

Videl put her hand down slowly, feeling awful for slapping her friend. But he gave her no other choice. What if someone has SEEN them in there? She prepared herself to get the cold shoulder, to get yelled at… but she couldn't prepare herself for what Ari said next.

"You… you're a girl," he said, his voice disbelieving.

Well.

There went the neighborhood.

---


End file.
